looking for the christmas feeling

it is only a few hours before christmas and the christmas lights attached to our window grills has never showed any flicker of hope that it will share even a faint light.

this will be the fourth consecutive year where my family and i will spend christmas in the house free of decorations and other christmas-related materials. i bet this christmas will be the same; it will just be the same old furniture set and just a few more people vying for gifts and food, but aside from that, nothing more.

lately, i’ve been missing the “christmas feeling” that i used to feel when i was younger.
the air of christmas back when i was a kid seemed to be lost somewhere.

colorful lights that usually add up joy and liven up the christmas spirit were less visible. sincerity slowly crawled away from children singing carols.
i recalled about ten years ago how my friends and i would create improvised instruments from used milk cans and flattened soda bottle caps. caroling back then was more of a form of a get-together activity; the gifts and money we received were just bonuses.
sadly, most children today would go in solitaire and sing a few lines of a carol then beg for money.

i have heard many people’s claim about not feeling the christmas spirit lately. maybe the economy and the society in general have something to do with it. economic instability, stress, personal issues, material insatiability and alike somehow blocked the christmas air from being felt by the majority.

over coffee, i asked a friend about the whereabouts of the lost “christmas feeling” that we had when we were young. i told her my observations about the evolution of the society, and the speed of its change which in turn could have affected the loss of the “christmas feeling.”

“the christmas feeling was never gone. it’s just that we were growing old.”

really? i took another look at the streets. still, there were plenty of lights, a few children still march on the road to sing their carols, and glittery christmas decors were still hung in most places.
she could be right. the “christmas feeling” was never lost. i just grew older.
old people tend to be less perceptive of the simplicity of the “christmas feeling” because of too much preoccupation with the world.

over the past four years, i have allowed the world to take from me the “christmas feeling” that happened to be one of the reasons that made the day extraordinary than the rest. i was so busy dealing with the world that i was not able to check the wires and the bulbs of the christmas lights attached on our window grills.
the wires were torn, and the bulbs were broken.

i still have a few hours to replace the bulbs and fix the wires. a faint hope that the bulbs can still light this christmas, and that somehow, by any chance, i may be able to feel the “christmas feeling.”


Anonymous said...

itong paskong 'to ang paskong hours away nalang ay hindi ko pa feel at parang wala lang. i don't know kung ako ba ang dahilan o talagang the spirit of xmas isn't around anymore. mas excited pa ako sa mga gala ko. hehe.

Unknown said...

Same here... we're trying so hard to squeeze some 'effort' to pull out all our Mr. Christmas decors from our shelves (only to discover some that have been pestered by rats already but still can be repaired though). I think it was only two days ago.

We refrain decorating for the past few years. Not only that our decors would cost a fortune on our bills, we, too, are just lazy to pack them up when the season is over.

I need a refreshment.

Anonymous said...

the feeling is mutual, i can hardly feel the 'christmas feeling' too. worse, i don't know why. unlike you, it's not about growing old, there seems to be something else that i really don't know as to why i feel lonely during christmas.

i posted something about that eh, if u have time, visit my blog...

Merry Christmas!

Anonymous said...

kuya, have urself a merry christmas and a prosperous new year!!! bless God first and God will bless you!!!

bulitas said...

@ rob:hay.

@ neil:haha. maybe we just got too lazy to feel the christmas spirit. whatev.

@ virginia:there's just something about therecent christmas that gives u an empty feeling. i don't know. maybe i'm just hungry.

@ irish:thanks irish. so sweet of u.


Mike said...

Few hours after the clock hit 12 and I haven't received any greeting yet. Dammit. In our household where everyone gets too lazy to dismantle the decors, the wreath had already spent like two years dangling from our ceiling. And it still looks freakingly good, like it just came out from the box.

Have a merry Christmas, dude.

Anonymous said...

[overdue comment. Xp]

When you do things over and over again without meaning, it becomes just another routine. And when it becomes just another routine, then it becomes empty. You can count on that. Then you'll know everything's just superficial.

Yup. maaari ngang yung mga turmoil sa bansa ang nagcause ng pagkawala ng Christmas "feeling".. Pero tayo rin may problema eh. why? because of what we look for in a celebration. because of what we're looking for when we celebrate Christmas. sometimes, we're just too caught up and preoccupied with the celebration itself that we tend to forget what it is we're celebrating.

Kanino bang birthday 'to? Hindi naman atin, di ba?

Jesus was born in a manger. Imagine getting born (or even in Mary's PoV, giving birth) in a damp, smelly place surrounded by animals. Come on, I bet the animals didn't really stare at Jesus like most belens portray it; they probably did their usual animal stuff, walking around, snorting and drooling all over the place. Did Jesus complain? Of course not, he was only a few seconds old. But here's the clincher: before His birth Christ knew that he was going to be born for one purpose: to die. He was born to die for you. To take your place. Did He complain?

Want to enjoy Christmas? Strip it down to its core. Thank God He was born.

Merry Christmas? You can be merry anytime you want. Just have a meaningful CHRISTmas. Sounds cliche? Not when you've experienced it.

Hahaha.. napahaba. XD

bulitas said...

@ tsapsuy: great. uv nailed it!
let's all have a meaningful christmas and make each day as merry as we can!
carpe diem everyone!

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...